Calm Carl

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I'm a Man

I’m a man! I fuck and I fight and I fix…Stuff. I work like a bastard and that’s enough

To stop me having to do washing, ironing, fetching or cleaning.

I don’t sit down in a pub, at the bar is where you’ll find me leaning, talking about sport, machines, sex, money and violence…

How you’re a cunt if you pay for any sort of licence.

I drink lots and I drink quickly, I spend money on ‘things’ and I dress very slickly.

I’m a dapper, a don, a doer of deeds. I treat women like shit. I’m just sowing my seeds, they’re not people with feelings/emotions,

they’re there to help me to go through the motions of releasing the pressure and pain all tied up inside.

This will not be a comfortable ride.

We’re not making love, I’m just having sex, a complicated wank while I remember my ex…

Who showed me the truth,

allowed me to love

Got through to my soul,

allowed me to love

Let me be who I was,

allowed me to love

Made me earn her respect,

allowed me to love

Allowed no control yet

allowed me to love

But I couldn’t do it in front of my mates my muckers, my pals, a bunch of reprobates

We’re there for each other through thick and through thin the fun we’ve had, the scrapes we’ve been in the secrets we share of the bad we have done meant that she could never be The One

‘Cos I’m a man, a member of a tribe there’s a behaviour to which I must subscribe - I do not cry, or need a cuddle, I do not shelter from the wind, I do not skip around a puddle,

I do not put sunscreen on my skin, I do not ask for help, directions or a glass, if you use words like preconceptions I’ll shove ‘em up your arse,

I do not dance at the disco, I do not go to balls, I do not ponce around under fucking glitter balls,

I do not queue, I do not wait in line and if that causes me more problems well that’s just fucking fine,

I do not worry about the future, I do not think about the past, I do not see the point of slowing down, I like to do things…

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